Sunday, August 25, 2013

Lessons Learned

As I embark on this journey, many people run through the thoughts from friends to mentors and lastly, family. How did I get where I am today and wherever I will be in the future? The only answer coming to mind is my family.

It wasn't a single event. It wasn't a particular choice. My family taught me directly and indirectly.

My mom gives me the gift of creativity, the "dare to be different" mentality, and my big heart. My dad gives me a hard-working, never give up attitude combined with a sense of humor to get through difficult periods.

My brother's and sister's set the bar high, excelling at what they did. Being closest to the brother nearest in age, he taught me how to take care of business. He teaches me to think a little more deeply, question the world, and make up my own mind. He taught me moderation and balance.

My sister teaches me patience, patience she uses when with her daughter. She teaches me love for the world and everything it has to offer.

My oldest brother teaches me to laugh. He teaches me forgiveness and the love that goes along with it.

I could go on for pages and may very well at some point, telling of the people who have impacted my life, and the lessons learned from each person. It is not always what someone has done well or right where I have learned a lesson, sometimes it is the individual's shortcomings. It is in forgiving the individual and being non-judgmental, for we all have shortcomings. We all make mistakes. We are all human.

But I am a hero. I choose to be a hero. This choice has been made because I've seen people throughout my entire life capable of far more than they give themselves credit for, me included. People who sell themselves short. People who take the easy road because someone told them they were no good. People who took to drugs and alcohol because their mind told them lies everyday about what they were capable of being. If I can be a hero in my own life and display the characteristics of being the best version of myself, then maybe, just maybe some little boy or girl, some mother or father, some lowly person on a terrible day, some person scared to press on and make the change in their life will use me as an inspiration to see the light they possess. Maybe with the pursuance of my dreams and making them a reality, I can help people, unseen people, realize they are powerful beyond measure. These maybe's are not hope's though. I fully intend on this becoming as true as the sun that shines every day. Too many times growing up I didn't shine my own light. Living in fear and becoming depressed because of the unfulfilled soul forced me to question my entire life many times. Was it even worth living if my soul remained unfulfilled? The answer was almost a begrudging yes at the time of questioning. At my lowest points, it was physically painful to get out of bed. It hurt to see people. It felt like everybody knew I was a phony. Like they knew my soul was unfulfilled and that I was wasting my gift. This hurt more than anything. Not being able to happy was one thing, but not being able to bring joy to others was unbearable. Step by step, inch by inch, I crawled out of the whole. Then, miraculously I started walking. Soon, I wasn't even looking back. Sure there were pit stops along the way and road-bumps but I was moving forward. Eventually, my body became strong and I was running. And now, here I am. The road isn't any easier than it was when I crawled out of the deep, dark hole that was my unfulfilled life at the soul level. But now, the movement is in the direction of my love. And that my friends, is the road I hope to inspire you to find. It's in you, it's in every single one of us.

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.' We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." ~ Marianne Williamson

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